What does the pain of our differentness tell us? It’s whispered many things to me over the years – that I wasn’t acceptable, that I was wrong, bad, off-putting, odd, unlovable, and selfish. For a very long time, I believed and found external validation in the less favorable interpretations of my differences.
I used them to validate a belief that I’d internalized – I am on my own. This belief caused me anguish, but it also gave me incredible drive and determination.
Because I believed I was and would always be on my own, I made damn sure that I could do everything myself. I became wildly independent and capable yet struggled to establish healthy relationships.
Post-divorce, finding myself crying alone on the kitchen floor for hours a day when the kids were at their dad’s, I had to drag this belief out into the light and examine whether it was still serving me well. I realized that it was this very belief that had caused me to sabotage my relationships. At my core, I believed I was on my own, so I made it so.
I still struggle with allowing my differences to exist openly in the world, but I am also improving my ability to see the opportunities it provides. Because I am me, I have unique abilities to connect with, move and inspire others if I am brave enough to speak my truth.
2026 is the year of the Fire Horse. This is a year to shout your absolute truths from the rooftops, and to pay attention to all the ways that the world responds. This is a year to shine the light on your beliefs and ask yourself how they can better serve you in becoming the best version of yourself.
Let the wild, fire horses reign!
Quinn Steele 